this last week has been really hard.

im not too sure even why. im really missing my friends. im really missing solid ground. its really difficult. i only have one person to tell everything to, to share anything with, to hang out with, and he has friends and his life and space he needs. so for me, this is hard. i want to be able to miss hanging out with friends, well i do, but i cant just bust out to canada and hang out, obviously! i have friends, but they are all my friends through denni, so sometimes to hang out with them without him is weird. i dont wanna be a crazy girlfriend, im not like that. i have nobody to talk to here. nobody to spill my guts to. i need someone to understand me. i need to stop thinking so much. i wish i could just have someone here with me.

i know im here, and what im doing is strong and brave and all that, but its really hard. there are so many things i wish i had a girl to talk about with. so so many things that i wish someone could just listen to and understand.

i need some friends.