breathe.
just breathe.

im trying to update everyday but i cant even think.

i shot pre wedding photos for my friends yesterday. it was cute. and we had to pay this man cuz we were in a private area. fuck corruption.

im so hungry and want a nice sandwich. i really miss the food already. i eat the same thing here almost daily and im sick of it already. hahaha.

all my girlfriends are not in the city. come come back to meeee...
i think this is gonna be a boring month of no job. but im trying to find private lessons now.

thats all now. hahah

only in asia.

im going to try my hardest to update this daily.

i have arrived in indonesia.
today on the way to the airport in kuala lumpur me and my friend angga were in a taxi and the tire popped. the driver pulled over to check it out, it was fully popped, could see the rim. he kept driving, slowly, to the airport. only only here would this happen.

ive been bitten by a thousand ants already. fuck.

it was amazing to see denni. he sounded sick though. he is at school now. has exams. its my friends birthday, and i dunno if i said this before but for your birthday you must pay for everyone. so we will go to one of my favourite places called, nelayan. it has dimsum and shit and im gonna get bihun seafood goreng and crab and corn soup and im stoked. i had a watermelon juice already. it was delish. and im so tired.

last night i was in malaysia visiting my friends. it was wonderful. we got baked and drank some beer and just hung out. i didnt see anything there at all. but i didnt really have the energy to. i will go back.

my flight was alright. not bad. not good. long. obviously.
i met a guy from mississauga who dates a girl from sheridan's photography program. weird. he is an underwater photographer. cool. and they didnt order me vegetarian meal, but it ended up being okay because there was salmon. my legs were swollen after the flight. apparently thats bad.

i already miss everyone. and english. but its fun being around everything so different.
MUCH LOVE

everything that hurts me just makes me stronger.

i feel i need to reflect on my trip thus far.

WOW. is how its been. WOW.

ive been through SO much in this short time and learned so so much about myself and life. and even though alot of bad shit happened. i happened to turn it around and find some really good things.

i love canada.
when i got here i dunno if i felt that way. if you've read my blog since hali you will know that i wasnt too happy before i moved to hali and in hali but then i went to indo and it was completely amazing and i met amazing people and have a wonderful boyfriend. i like my life there. and didnt really know how i felt about the one in canada anymore.

my first month, my life pretty much fell all around me and it was horrible. i had some stability from my friends and family and some that pushed me away instead of helping me through things. thank you dearly dearly to those who helped. you know exactly who you are. all of you.

my second month, well everything got fixed. and i found myself again. i knew the summer i met the people in kw who i was. and its come back from being in kw, though by meeting different people, and reuniting with old ones. its been amazing and im totally completely happy with where i am in my life and who i am. ive missed denni so much and i think its made me grow alot too. so many events that have happened have made me grow. its been a great great trip i would say, even though the first month fell apart. sometimes things have to get worse before they get better. i accept that now.

oh dear. im gonna cry alot. i will try my hardest to stay in contact. you are always with me though. i feel bummed and excited. ill be back in 2 years, maybe less. definitely xmas '11. if you want to come visit, ill for sure hook you up. this is so hard. but i know it will just make me stronger. AHHH.

life. is. good.